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Marriage Equality Float Getting Real Tired of Fucking Marching

It was a solemn and sober gathering that formed at Howards Storage World this week, as gay and lesbian activists partook in what has become a time honored ritual of preparing the Marriage Equality Mardi Gras float for another fucking year.

Now entering their 37th parade, organisers for the float say they were surprised and deflated to be asked back for another Mardi Gras, stating they had all expected last year would have been the last time they ever would have needed to wheel out the decrepit and aging converted Datsun. “The float itself is now older than most of our marchers,” says Marriage Equality convener Rick Wilson. “In fact, a lot of our younger members don’t even remember a time when we weren’t on the brink of marriage equality.”

The theme for the float this year has already been selected, with organisers deciding on the slogan “Congratulations, we’re now less fucking progressive than Alabama”, which narrowly beat out “Seriously? The Prime Minister’s sister is gay and we can’t get this done?”, and “Hey at least we’re not Russia” for this year’s billing.

Organisers say they hope this year will be the last time they ever have to march in any kind of parade demanding basic civil rights, but admit they’ve been saying that “for the last ten fucking years now” and “really aren’t holding out much hope anymore”.

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