The newly re-elected head of FIFA Sepp Blatter has announced in Geneva today that his organisation has come to quick and peaceful resolution with Swiss authorities, following recent corruption charges that had seen nine high ranking FIFA officials taken into custody.
Speaking the day after his reinstatement as President of the international football cartel, Blatter said that the organisation had come to recognize many significant problems with the tendering process that had awarded Qatar the World Cup in 2022. “As a result of this,” Blatter announced, “Switzerland has agreed to drop all charges against the accused board-members on the condition that Qatar’s hosting duties be revoked.”
Blatter went on to announce that Swiss authorities have “also accepted an offer to host the 2022 World Cup in Qatar’s place” in order to avoid any further potential for corruption in the tendering process.
It is understood that FIFA will be voluntarily handing over $20 Billion in subsidies to the Swiss government as a result to offset the cost of having to host the games with only seven years notice, and a number of high ranking Swiss officials will now become permanent members on FIFA’s board to oversee any future corruption.
Representatives for the Swiss Government were unavailable for comment at the time of publication due to an all expenses paid cruise in the Bahamas.