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  1. ASIO
    Dec 31, 2014 - 01:19 AM

    We are not watching you, and we take great offence to the suggestion that we are illicitly monitoring Australian citizens. Just last night Mr Wheedon James remarked to his wife Brenda James, nee Smith, after a bout of sex in which Mrs James was left quite unsatisfied according to her later text to her mother, Mrs Jim Smith Nee Burnuby, he remarked that he had the strangest feeling of having been followed by a man dressed as a bicycle messenger. This is an example of how irresponsible reporting such as your own is creating a nation of paranoia. Our agent was not dressed as a bicycle messenger at all, he was dressed as a Nun.

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    • Jeremy Birmingham
      Dec 31, 2014 - 01:21 AM

      Very well said, sir.

      Reply
  2. Jeremy Birmingham
    Dec 31, 2014 - 01:20 AM

    We are not watching you, and we take great offence to the suggestion that we are illicitly monitoring Australian citizens. Just last night Mr Wheedon James remarked to his wife Brenda James, nee Smith, after a bout of sex in which Mrs James was left quite unsatisfied according to her later text to her mother, Mrs Jim Smith Nee Burnuby, he remarked that he had the strangest feeling of having been followed by a man dressed as a bicycle messenger. This is an example of how irresponsible reporting such as your own is creating a nation of paranoia. Our agent was not dressed as a bicycle messenger at all, he was dressed as a Nun.

    We just realised that we forgot to write the previous message under a pseudonym.

    Reply

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