Cory Bernardi Looking Forward To Finally Marrying His Dog

Liberal Senator Cory Bernardi has today hailed the introduction of a same-sex marriage bill in the Australian senate, saying it was a small step towards the day when the public would finally accept his unorthodox relationship with his beloved dog.

In a tear filled speech on the floor of the senate Mr Bernardi thanked the bill’s sponsor, Senator David Leyonhjelm, saying “while we still have a long way to go, I hope someday like people in committed same-sex relationships, I too will be able to marry the love of my life, this sexy, babin’ Alsatian cross.”

While the prospect of man-dog marriages have long been fought for by the more conservative side of parliament, experts say there is still a long way to go for the public to accept Bernardi’s unorthodox choice of lifestyle. “Despite what Mr Bernardi may think, the introduction of same-sex marriage will in fact have very little effect on how people view his relationship with his dog,” says three time marriage expert Geoffrey Edelsten. “If anything, with his reputation for supporting domestic violence he’s probably doing the cause more damage than good.”

With sources AAP, BBC & RSPCA

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