Tony Abbott Legally Adopts Prince Charles
Australian Prime Minister and licensed Barmy Army™ membership holder Tony Abbott has today announced that, in his ongoing efforts to get the British monarchy to like him, he has legally adopted Prince Charles as his son.
The move comes just days after Abbott, in his annual Australia Day honours, granted a knighthood to Prince Phillip, the Duke of Edinburgh, who eagle-eyed readers may notice, is in fact both a Prince and a Duke.
In a statement written underneath an English muffin, the Prime Minister has described how he is overjoyed with the latest addition to the Abbott clan.
“Obviously, I am thrilled to finally have a son. I've always wanted a son, to whom I can pass on my extensive and well-researched knowledge on how to be a real man, whether it be fishing, or wrestling, or just being an all-round top bloke"